I'm tired of faking my life.

Even though I'm not completely happy in my situation, this day has already begun a little better because of a hot shower. The plumber finally came to look at our showers and turns out there are/were "scald guards" to prevent kids from burning themselves. So we've been taking luke-warm showers, if they were even that warm, since last June. BUT NOW!!!!...hot showers and baths! I'm so excited to be able to take baths again. They are definately no fun when the water is barely even warm.

Now it's time for Starbucks.

I'm feelin' pretty good today. I opened the store by myself and I'm working ALONE until Julie or Jen gets here from setting up for the wedding show tomorrow. I love my job. I love being in a shopping center with a Starbucks. I smell good today. I love not feeling depressed. And my dad is going to be stopping through Winston today and we're going to have lunch together. I haven't seen him since New Years Eve. I wanted to go home last weekend, but ended up working and I'm working the wedding show tomorrow so I can't go then. Thomas is going to Asheville on Sunday for the Super Bowl. If I don't end up babysitting for Jen, I may go with him. As long as I don't have to drive. Although, he'll want to take my car and I don't want him driving it. Hmmm. Oh well. I need to get back to folding brochures for tomorrow.

I'm hungry and it's past my lunch time! Wedding people need to GO AWAY!

Can this week get worse? Now my car won't start. Piece of shit ford. I never should've given up my Honda. NEVER! The tow truck man better hurry up and get here. I can't afford to not be at work on time.

I really thought Christmas would be different this year, being married and all. It's my least favorite holiday and after we got married, I was looking forward to it hoping we'd start making a few traditions of our own and that we'd finally get a tree this year. No. None of this has happened. No tree even though it's been promised to me since the day after Thanksgiving. We've already started fighting. Arguments about whose house we're going to be at when. Of course my family gets the shaft. They've gotten the shaft ever since Thomas and I started spending holidays together. But they don't mind, our family being smaller and always gathering in one place. Whereas his family is spread out and we never know if we're going to be in Hickory, Charlotte, Huntersville or Marion. Since my family only gets Christmas Eve with us, I feel like it's pretty important that we at least spend the night with them so we can see them Christmas morning. I'm an only child! My dad and grandparents and aunt and uncle WANT to see me. JESUS! So it really just ticks me off when Thomas tells me last night that he wants to drive to Hickory on Christmas Eve AFTER we're done with my family. NO. I don't think so mister. Stupid marriage compromises. Plus I have to see my mom and other grandmother that day too. I hate all holidays like this. I'm so thankful we don't celebrate Easter. I often wonder why we even celebrate Christmas. My uncle (through marriage) is the only one that even goes to church on Christmas and it's because his mom died. And that's another thing...my brother's grandfather died (his father's father) and my great uncle died this month. And my grandfather is the last of his siblings left and he's depressed about it. UGH. HOLIDAYS SUCK.

Anyway...the sound of poker chips constantly being dropped into a person's hand. My house is full of men playing poker, drinking beer and watching basketball in HD. Oh my God. Thank goodness for my dinner plans tonight.


*NOTE TO WHITNEY*
Everytime I hear a Prince song now, I think of you. I heard one today and that's what reminded me.

Today is going to be a great day for a nervous breakdown. The crying has already begun.

Why can't people be courteous? I don't understand how writing a number or a check mark on the reply card, sticking it in and sealing the envelope and putting it in your mailbox with the flag up is so damn hard. Granted, the 30 cards that haven't come back yet (that's more than half of them) still have until Saturday to get here. I spent money that I don't technically have on those stupid stamps so that people could easily send them back. Maybe it really doesn't matter. But I'd still like to know so that I can give Homewood an accurate number and the caterer an accurate number. Grrr. I'm just irritated. I've already had to invite extra people that I didn't want to invite. Turns out those are the people that send their stupid reply cards back and THEY'RE COMING, of course.

I guess I just need something to bitch about constantly, and planning a wedding gives me plenty of things to bitch about. Never, will I EVER, do this again.

I can't get Napoleon Dynamite out of my head! Geeeeeeez!